Trend alert! What’s the new shit in 08? Those of you in the know might know that the next big trend in streetwear is no doubt Green Sheik. But just what is “Green Sheik?” If you ask me, Green Sheik is a mix of tight skate gear and technical hiking/slash eco-nerd gear that is worn by environmentalist hipsters with money to burn, and people who hike or ride mountain bikes who might actually need tech gear to protect them from nature. Lets back up a little bit here. I noticed along with some of my Transworld SURF cronies that more and more “cool kids” have been running around rocking Patagonia windbreakers and North Face jackets (North Face puffer jackets aren’t just for gang members anymore). After a brief discussion regarding the strange occurrence we got back to work and I forgot about the whole conversation. Later that night, my friend who happens to work at Patagonia told me that a group of skaters including Lindsay Robertson had come in to Patagonia and bought a bunch of gear including windbreakers and various fleece tops (that sounded gay). Anyway, that got me thinking, holy shit, first it was random surf heads wearing this stuff, then pro skaters, who claimed “this shit’s so good to skate in.”

Now the brain machine is turning and for the first time in my life, I think I might be on the edge of the newest trend! The next day I was playing Scrabble with some other friends, one of which is in advertising. We got to talking about my revelation, and he informed us that this movement already had a name, Green Sheik.

            So there you go, March 2^nd, 2008, Green Sheik entered my vocabulary and I have no doubt bragged to more than a few people in the know that I knew about this eco-hipster movement before most normal people, and now you know about it, and no, you are not normal and neither am I. Green Sheik, watch out world, watch out hipsters, watch out wallets—green sheik will not be cheap! More to come … 

That title is a little harsh. I can’t tell you how many times I had a robust belly laugh while reading a Far side comic. But like most of you, I think I’ve seen them all. Remember that one where the fish had friends over for dinner and they died and floated to the top of the bowl? Yeah, that was a funny one.

Anyway, there’s a website called creasedcomics.com and on this site you will see the best comics you’ll ever see. If you like Kathy, don’t go there cause you wont get the subtleties and there are no jokes about diet cola or whatever the shit she talks about. The genius behind this site is Brad Neely; you may have watched his stuff on superdeluxe.com. I would like for Mr. Neely to win the goddamn Pulitzer or something.

How can he not win an award for radness? I just wanted everybody to go to this site and get lost in his wit and sketchy vibe—I can’t even tell you how much time I’ve wasted on this site, looking, reading, laughing, crying, laughing, weeping, and laughing some more. I’m so stupid.

Oh yeah, above this is one of Brad’s genius comics, Death and his friend doing a panty raid, how amazing is that shit!

Yeah, um. Here’s my new blog. Not that I had an old blog. what you will find on this blog is a bunch of crap that wouldn’t work on transworldsurf.com, or, stuff that i’m too embarrassed to put on that awesome website. Cote’s Cube is a place for you to find epic gear, supremely cool resteraunts and bars, skate spots (for medicore skaters like me), look at art, see what happens at lame parties, check out my friends being all friendly and shit, and you may even learn something (god forbid).

Anyway, above you will see a very good looking man sitting on a kick ass Mustang (barf).
Well, thank you for coming, keep checking in, i’ll be putting this lame shit up all day.
i love you, Love Chris.

I came across this silly ass (literally) pencil sharpener on gizmodo.com (I think) and my immediate reaction was a giggle. At first I thought I really wanted one of these doggy-style-in-the-butt-pencil-sharpeners, but after that moment of retardation I realized I don’t even use pencils that much, and if I did, I would get a cool electric sharpener because I’m lazy and I like techy bullshit. Anyway, I forgot where I found this thing so I put “butthole pencil sharpener” in the google search widget thing and it directed me to a feminist website that pointed out how much of an asshole male I was.

The website said, “ … a stark reminder of how the world sees women? It seems the perfect woman is almost always dismembered and frequently being penetrated.”

So according to this feminist blog I was directed to, I want to put pencils up girls butt’s and chop their heads off, just because I thought this thing was funny? I hope my subconcious mind doesn’t have any weird thoughts like that, that would be really fucked up. i just think it’s a funny pencil sharpener. Great, now I’ve over analyzing it and i won’t even be able to sleep tonight—thanks a lot doggy style pencil sharpener.

It’s not as easy as it used to be to rule a party. I’ve tried nudity, I’ve tried being the drunkest guy there, I’ve tried to be the most sober and condescending, and I’ve even tried the whole sobbing in the corner deal. Sure, I’ve been the toast of the kegger a few times in my day, and yeah, I’ve been “that guy” on the beach more than a few times, but now that I’m getting older, puking, dancing naked, wearing an ealskin watch, and making out with a dude aren’t in my party arsenal anymore.

That’s why I think I need to invest in the best new form of transportation I’ve ever seen. The 14 M.P.H Cooler is a three-wheeled rideable party ruler that will take you from just another dipshit drunk to the coolest (yep, that is a pun) cat at the party. Can you imagine blasting down the beach on this thing waving to everybody, tossing ice-cold beers around like you were on a float in the Madres Gras parade? I can.

The positives are endless with this product (there’s even a cup holder on the front between where your knees go!). The only negatives are as follows: you can only carry 24 beers (that will last about an hour at my local beach), it only goes 15 miles, and it only supports up to 300 pounds (your chick or dude better be light if you want to ride doubles).

All in all, I think this product could change the world, and probably will. You can get it at www.hammacher.com for $500 bucks, so go get it and lets race!

Is it just me or does this thing look like it’s holding up a monkey mask? But I digress* A scientist from New Zealand named Jean-Phillipe Boubli found this thing while trudging (anytime I picture a person walking through a rain forest I see it as trudging, and it doesn’t look pleasant in my imagination) along the border of Brazil and Venezuela.

The Kiwi scientist had been looking for this monkey for five years, leading me to ponder the question; what now? After searching for a tiny primate for five years and finally finding it, what do you do? Take a picture, smile, and figure out a new little creature to search for? I would never have the patience for that type of work, but thank god somebody does. That’s why I’m naming Jean Phillpe Boubli the Cote’s Cube Person Of the Day! What an amazing honor.

Photograph by Italo Mourthe and story pillaged from nationalgeographic.com

* digress |d??gres| leave the main subject temporarily in speech or writing.

As Editor In Chief of Transworld SURF magazine, I often allow myself the privilege of gallivanting across the globe on missions of content gathering, goodwill, and basic schmoozing with pro-bros in order to further advance the supremacy of Transworld SURF.

See, if you don’t get out there and put yourself in the mix, the bros and pros will forget about you and it will be harder to get them in the magazine and on transworldsurf.com. Either way, whenever I go on a surf trip or “schmooze” trip, I always bring my skateboard, cause you never know what fun park or random obstacle will be waiting for you wherever you go. Always bring your skateboard. Here’s some footage I shot at the new skate park that’s right across the street from a surf spot on the North Shore of Oahu called Rockpiles.

The park is concrete, has perfect transition, is smooth as butter, and has more fun lines than a night in Hollywood with Lindsay Lohan.

Here’s a video I shot holding my little Elph camera. This is what you’d see if you were a mediocre skater rolling around the new park on the North Shore.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give this park an 8. If you ever go to the North Shore, I’d make a valiant effort to check this spot out, it rains a lot, so it’s tricky to time it right. Oh yeah, if it’s wet, you’ll slide out and bust your ass so don’t try to be a hero, you are not Marc Johnson.